Friday, February 5, 2016

Taking the good with the bad

Any chance to get together with my children is good and the support of family under sad circumstances took away some of the pain.

Here are Jon, Ken, and Marie in back and Kimie and Julie in front. We had just finished a lunch break and Kimie was headed out to the station to get the Narita express on the first leg of her return to Oregon.

At the return to the hospital for the evening visiting hour, we were met with unwanted news.
It had been noticed sometime between the 8th and 9th of January that Paul had suffered a stroke, as his left arm was not moving. A CT scan verified the issue but unfortunately the treatment for pneumonia and stroke were at odds. A second CT scan on the 11th showed the whole right brain was involved and the end would have not been positive. He passed away peacefully shortly after, surrounded by family and our pastor.

The following days were a blur but through the kindness of the pastor of the Japanese church where we were members in the early 60's, a Christian cremation was arranged.

Paul, whose passion in life was being a bridge, had ended with one more between the two churches.

There have been so many hoops to jump through and my Japanese skills are sorely inadequate. Norie needed to get some home time and Marie, who has lived in Boston since her college days, was most helpful in dragging me around to assorted offices to get things done ... figuring out which bills had not been paid, reporting to the bank and ward offices, and sorting paperwork.

Jon and Julie Jr. were the next to return to their families and work.  I really needed to get some of my life back too and made a date to meet with Tanya and Carin (AKA Queenie) at the Tokyo Dome quilt show. They have both made some great posts on the show and it was such a joy to be there together. Once a year is NOT enough!

I am so grateful for all my families, kids and relatives, my church and choir family, my school family, and my Scouting family,  ... and even my precious blogging friends.  This is not the way I would have chosen to find out who my real friends are and I can never thank you all enough for your kind words and prayerful thoughts.

Last weekend I went as planned to the Women's  Conference and enjoyed a prayerful time with old friends and new. I taught a hand quilting basics class and enjoyed the results ... some students going on to make a second project.  Marie and Ken were the last to leave the day before and Nikko and I are getting back to the schedule, though she now walks with me instead of running beside Paul's bike.

There are still months worth of problems to sort out ... debts, taxes, paperwork... still, Piper is singing and the plum tree is getting ready to celebrate the February birthdays. Without my in-house translator of quilt show names of quilters I am wondering if I can put any posts of the work.

So ... that is what is happening in chilly Tokyo for all who have wondered.
Tomorrow is another day ... "Scout Sunday"and I have promised to give the children's message. Life goes on.


32 comments:

  1. Julie, I was stunned to hear of the death of your husband. I send my love and prayers to you as you rebuild your life. All your hobbies and church and scouting will help you get through the coming days. Peace and Love to you and your family.

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  2. Julie, dear friend, so good to see you back here. I am sure there have been many trying days, visits to offices, and so much more, I was so happy to see you with Tanya and Queenie, and, as I have found, when a family member dies, the days continue the same, as the sun rises and sets.I am sure the scouting fraternity and your churches will be there. Many hugs, I had wondered when you would have the courage to put this all in words. XXX

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  3. Julie.... Much love to you from across the miles! So glad you have had good support navigating through the labyrinth of details at such a difficult time - what a blessing to have capable loving adult children. Xo

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  4. My thoughts are with you and your family.

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  5. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I don't often post a comment but I do enjoy reading your blog. It was good to see that you were able to get to the Tokyo quilt show with Tanya. Blessings to you in the coming days and weeks ahead as you sort things out.

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  6. So glad you got to do the Dome Show with friends. Have been thinking of all the stuff you still have to do. Glad you have kids and friends you can call on. I'm working on a short visit this spring/summer. We'll get together then.

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  7. I was wondering, and was going to send you an email, but, I saw that you met with Tanya, and figured that maybe you had just been busy, or, had more computer problems. So sorry for your loss. You and Nikko will comfort each other, when other family isn't there to comfort you. Know that others are praying for you. Hope you can get everything taken care of, and find a new normal in the following months.

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  8. I was stunned when I saw this post and my heart goes out to you. I know no words can ease the pain of loss but my heart and spirit are with you and I am always here if you just want to chat. I am glad that your family was there to be there for you and to help with paperwork, not something we need to deal with and nice to have others who can help.

    Debbie

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  9. So sorry to hear that you have had such a loss. The many years you have been together will mean that in so many ways you will feel so lost. I didn't realise when you had been to the quilt show that your husband had died. But I am glad you got to be with friends. I am glad your family came to support you and help you with the paperwork side of things. I am glad your church family is supporting you, too.
    May God be very close to you as you adjust to a very different life.
    Sandy in the UK

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  10. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Yes, life does indeed go on. It sounds like you have a wonderful support group. Just remember to take care of your own health. Breathe.

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  11. Deepest condolences to you Julie, and your family. Treasure all those precious memories.

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  12. Every day I think of you when I see my little angel who is watching over you. I know your family has been such a sweet help during this time. Your memories will always be a treasure.

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  13. I have been thinking about you a lot lately - BIG HUGS to you and your family!! I know how difficult it is to adjust to a "new normal" and I am so glad that you were able to go to the Tokyo Dome quilt show with Tanya and Queenie. Like others have said - take care of yourself now - and breathe - ;))

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  14. Thank you for sharing. I am so sorry for your loss. What a wonderful family you and Paul made. Keep up the good work, I am rooting for you.

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  15. Julie,
    Even though I've never met you or Paul, you and I have become blogging friends and my heart goes out to you over your loss. Please know that I grieve with you over Paul's death. You are in my prayers, my friend.

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  16. I'm sorry for your loss, good your family was with you take care Jaana

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  17. Best wishes, Julie. I am pleased your family has been around and I also understand the need to have some of your own time too.
    It sounds like there is a lot of red tape to deal with in Japan. I hope you can find your way through the tangle.
    It is lovely that you have been to the quilt show and have kept on with your church and scouting activities.
    Thinking of you.

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  18. Dear Julie.... Heartfelt condolences from California. Been watching your blog daily for word of Paul, and it is with a heavy heart that I read of your loss. You have a wonderful family and support group to lean on. Take care of yourself. Hugs - Terry

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  19. So glad to find you posting again. You are an amazing woman to get right in there and keep on with the daily chore of living. Such a lesson you give us all! Loved seeing you surrounded by all your smiling children at such a time too. I am glad I got to give Paul that one hug and handshake at the station last year.

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  20. Julie, please know that you are always in our thoughts and prayers. We are so glad that your children came to visit and provide comfort and support. We are also glad that you were able to visit the Dome Show with Tanya and Queenie. We'll always be grateful for your friendship across the miles. Your children look so kind and loving. What a beautiful family you have raised. Take care, with many blessings, from Marina and Daryl

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  21. Dearest Julie thank you for letting your followers know of your new situation. How wonderful your children could be there with you. Wonderful too how as a woman of faith and inner resource you are going on with your life and your work for others as well as your quilting - most reassuring for your children too. You and your husband did a good job! You are in my thoughts - Mary

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  22. My deepest condolences to you and your family. It is good that your children were there to help you inform the different institutions about your husband's death, that's a difficult job to do. You are in my prayers.

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  23. Dear Julie, I am so sorry to hear this news. Hope things are getting easier.

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  24. Dear Julie, I want to send you my deepest condolences. I am so sorry for your loss. It's very moving, that even in his passing away your husband was this "bridge". I will light a candle for him and for you here in Kevelaer, a place of pilgrimage to Mary as consolatrix afflictorum, who consoles the grieving in the west of germany. it's good for you to have your friend and family around. hugs, jana

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  25. I was showing a friend your blog today and was so very saddened to read of Paul's death. Dear friend, my prayers are with you during this very difficult time.

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  26. Oh my .... My thoughts, prayers and hugs for you.

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  27. Oh Julie, I am so sorry for your loss, and for your family's. Lots of thoughts and prayers for you. It is a blessing that you have the quilting world to help sustain you.

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  28. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My heart aches for you and your family. With all my love and prayers, Sandy

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  29. Julie - I am very sorry to hear that Paul has passed away. I just happened to be on the internet looking for your e-mail address since I wanted to let you know that I published today an article on my blog on cardboard box ovens, which is something I learned from you some 20 years ago. My e-mail address is jgrusse@earthlink.net and my blog is www.greasylittlebirds.com. Jim Russell

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  30. Thanks for your comment - I was lucky enough to visit Japan on a trip when we lived in KL 1999-2000. My husband who has travelled hugely in his life is now reluctant to take long haul journeys so sadly it's unlikely I would return.

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  31. My sympathies to you and your family.

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  32. Hello Julie, I know it must all seem like yesterday that you had to say your last goodbye to your sweet man. It seems nothing ever prepares us for these moments. With all my sincere prayers and hope that you find comfort that you both made such an impact on our world and his footprints will continue with your children and the love you have in your heart....May all the days ahead be filled with memories that are sweet...

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